dismissive avoidant

Dismissive avoidant is an adult attachment style characterized by emotional self-reliance, discomfort with closeness, and a tendency to suppress or minimize needs for connection. It often develops when a child learns that expressing vulnerability brings rejection, dismissal, or emotional neglect.

Dismissive-avoidant adults typically appear independent and composed but may experience intimacy as suffocating, retreat under relational stress, and devalue partners when closeness feels risky. Beneath the distance is often unacknowledged longing and pain. Clinical work focuses on slowly building tolerance for closeness, noticing deactivation strategies, reconnecting with emotions and bodily signals, and allowing dependence to be experienced without shame.